How to Move Someone Into a Care Home

Before You Do Anything Else: Read the Contract

Most families sign the care home contract on move day, surrounded by bags and emotion, without reading it properly. This is one of the most common and costly mistakes.

Ask for the contract at least a week before the move. Read it carefully. Key things to check:

• What is included in the weekly fee and what is charged as an extra
• How much notice is required for fee increases — 28 days is standard; some homes give less
• Whether fees continue during hospital stays — many do, for up to a defined period
• The notice period for leaving — usually 28 days, but check
• What happens if the person's needs increase significantly — can they stay, or would they need to move to a higher-dependency unit or different home?
• Arrangements if the home closes or is taken over

If anything is unclear, ask. A good care home will answer without hesitation. If they're evasive about contract questions before the move, that tells you something.

Two Weeks Before the Move

Sort the GP transfer

This is one of the most commonly missed admin tasks. If the care home is outside the person's current GP catchment area, they'll need to register with a new GP. This takes time and shouldn't be left until after the move.

Ask the care home which GP surgery they recommend or use for most residents. Contact that surgery and start the registration process now. Make sure the current GP sends over the full medical history.

Also check:

• Who manages repeat prescriptions — the home, or the family?
• How medication is ordered and stored — care homes have specific procedures and you need to understand them before day one

Write a "This Is Me" document

This is a simple document that tells care staff everything they need to know about the person — their routines, preferences, history, and personality. Many care homes have their own version. If they don't, write your own.

Include:

• What they like to be called
• Morning and evening routines — what time they get up, how they like their tea, what helps them sleep
• Food likes and dislikes, allergies, favourite meals
• Things that comfort them when they're distressed
• Things that upset them (certain topics, loud noise, being rushed)
• Their life history — where they worked, family background, things they're proud of
• Hobbies and interests — music they love, programmes they watch, things that make them laugh

The more detailed this is, the faster the staff can build a relationship with the person. Hand it to the named nurse on arrival, not reception.

Notify everyone who needs to know

People to contact before or around the time of the move:

• DWP — Attendance Allowance changes on admission (it stops after 28 days if the council is funding); Pension Credit and other benefits may also be affected
• The council — if the person receives any council-funded care at home, this needs to be cancelled
• The local authority — if the property is now empty, there may be Council Tax exemption available
• Banks and financial institutions — especially if there's a Lasting Power of Attorney in place
• Utility companies — if the property is now empty or being managed differently
• Royal Mail — redirect post if the person won't be returning home
• DVLA — if they were still driving, notify them of the change of circumstances

Benefits change when someone moves into a care home. Attendance Allowance continues if the person is self-funding. It stops after 28 days if the council is paying. State Pension continues. Pension Credit may change. If you're unsure, ask the care home's admin team or contact Age UK — they deal with this regularly.

The Week Before the Move

Pack thoughtfully

What to bring:

• Enough clothing for a week (the home will do laundry)
• Personal toiletries — though check what the home provides
• Photographs and familiar objects — a favourite blanket, a clock they've had for years, anything that makes the room feel like theirs
• A small amount of cash for personal spending (typically kept by the home or in a personal allowance)
• Any mobility equipment they use regularly — but check with the home first about what's permitted

What not to bring:

• Irreplaceable items — jewellery, family heirlooms, sentimental objects. Loss and damage in care homes happens. If you wouldn't want to lose it, leave it at home.
• Electric blankets or extension leads — most homes prohibit these for fire safety reasons
• Large amounts of cash

Label everything. Every item of clothing, every possession. Do this before you arrive, not on the day. Use iron-on labels or a permanent marker. Unlabelled items disappear.

Make an inventory. Write down what you're bringing and keep a copy. If something goes missing, you'll have a record.

Prepare the person

How much you tell someone about the move depends on their cognitive state and what they can understand.

For someone with full capacity: be honest, involve them in the process, let them make choices about what to bring and how to decorate their room. The more agency they have, the easier the transition.

For someone with dementia: the guidance is less straightforward. Telling someone with advanced dementia about a move days in advance can cause prolonged distress without any benefit. Many families and care professionals recommend telling them on the day, framing it gently and positively. Ask the care home and the GP for their advice — they've been through this many times.

Move Day

Arrive when the room is ready

Confirm with the home the day before what time the room will be ready and who will be there to meet you. In an ideal world, the named nurse or key worker is on shift. Ask for this specifically.

If you're arriving from hospital, the timeline may be less in your control — hospital discharge teams move fast and the home may have less notice than is ideal. If this is your situation, call the home the evening before to confirm arrangements.

The paperwork

There will be forms to sign on the day. If you've read the contract already, this is straightforward. If you haven't, don't sign anything you haven't understood.

You'll likely be asked to confirm medication, next of kin details, GP details, and give consent for specific types of care. Take your time.

Setting up the room

Bring the photos and familiar objects and put them up before the person arrives if possible, or do it together with them if they'd prefer. A room that feels personal from day one makes a difference.

Don't over-furnish. The room has what it needs. A few meaningful items matter more than trying to recreate home.

How long to stay

This is the question nobody answers, and it's one of the hardest parts of the day.

There is no single right answer, but the most consistent advice from care staff and families who've been through it is this: stay long enough that the person is settled and comfortable, then leave warmly and with confidence.

A long, tearful goodbye makes it harder — for both of you. If you're distressed, the person picks up on it. A calm, warm, "I'll see you on Thursday, the staff are going to look after you" is better than staying until both of you are exhausted.

If the person is upset when you leave, that is normal and it usually passes quickly. Staff see this every day. Many families describe watching through the window as their parent stops crying and starts chatting to a carer within a few minutes of their leaving.

The drive home

Almost every family describes the drive home from move day as one of the hardest moments of the whole experience. You're alone, it's quiet, and the weight of what just happened hits you.

This is normal. It doesn't mean you did the wrong thing.

The First Two Weeks

Visit, but not too often at first

This sounds counterintuitive, but visiting every day in the first week can disrupt settling. Each visit resets the adjustment process — the person is reminded of home and the leaving is hard again.

Ask the care home what they recommend. Some suggest a day or two gap after move-in before the first visit, to let the person start to form their own routines with staff. Every situation is different, but it's worth asking.

When you do visit, try to come at a time that's not disruptive — not during meals, not during medication rounds. Ask the home what the best visiting times are.

Expect phone calls

If the person can use a phone, you may get calls asking to come home. This is one of the hardest ongoing experiences families describe.

How you handle it depends on the person. For someone with full capacity, honest and warm conversation — acknowledging how hard it is, reaffirming your love, and explaining why they're there — is usually right. For someone with dementia, arguing or trying to explain doesn't help. Redirect the conversation. Ask about lunch. Tell them you'll visit on Thursday.

If calls are very frequent and distressing, talk to the home. They may have suggestions, or it may be worth raising with the GP.

Watch, but try not to over-watch

Every family spends the first few visits looking for signs of neglect or unhappiness. This is completely understandable.

Try to look at the bigger picture rather than a single moment. Is the room clean? Does the person seem physically well? Are staff interacting warmly with residents? Do they know your relative's name and preferences yet?

If something specific concerns you, raise it with the named nurse immediately. Don't wait. Don't stockpile concerns.

The 4 to 6 week review

Every care home should conduct a formal review of the care plan at around 4 to 6 weeks. This is your opportunity to raise anything that's not working, ask questions, and make sure the care plan reflects who the person actually is.

Ask about this review if nobody mentions it. It's not optional — it's part of good care practice. Come prepared with specific observations and questions.